WEBVTT FILE

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all right

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true story

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stop saying okay okay

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true story I was in Spain Natalia I love

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you uh visiting a friend and she was

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talking to her father on the phone and

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all I heard was

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and I knew exactly what she was talking

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about

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she was saying okay okay okay okay okay

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okay okay okay

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and just from the tone and knowing what

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that word meant I knew the conversation

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without hearing another word

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why am I telling you this because I just

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said stop saying okay okay

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the last video I did say stop saying

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very I literally said to people it is a

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very good word I even said very and

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people were you said stop saying Theory

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but then you used it and I said it's a

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great word we use it the difference

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between myself and a person learning

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English or English speakers and a person

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learning English is we have a wider

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vocabulary so we can express ourselves

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differently and I'm trying to introduce

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something for you to have greater

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clarification that means being clear and

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when you're speaking and give you tools

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to do that and then if you want to say

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okay all the time please do but you

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might notice when you say things in a

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different variety you will get different

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information from the people you're

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speaking to

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and one of the things I will teach you

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today is something many English speakers

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complain about

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that when foreign speakers learn they

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say okay at this situation and they're

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like oh because I was thinking because

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in English we don't usually do it this

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way I'll get there you'll know exactly

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what it is and if you're an English

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speaker watching this you go yeah all

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the all the freak into every single time

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you know what I mean anyway so I said

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stop saying okay and I wrote two oks you

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can write both

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listen carefully

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if you're doing a formal paper or

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something professional please use this

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okay that's why I wrote it in blue but

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if you're texting a friend or something

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and it's casual you can use this okay

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okay okay

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formal informal hence red think

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carefully if you want to be safe just

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write this okay all the time you'll

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never have a problem okay so

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why is Okay popular I'll start with that

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because some of you will be like well if

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we're not supposed to say it why it is a

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very good word

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okay is an exclamation okay I'm

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exclaiming yeah okay this sounds good

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asking for permission right is it okay

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if I do this are you okay with that

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asking and giving permission sufficient

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oh there's a sufficient but not great

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when I studied logic when I was in

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university it was like something is

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sufficient but it doesn't have enough

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sufficient when you're saying this it

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means it's gonna say it's okay it's good

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it works but it's not the best

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how's the food okay it's okay I can eat

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it I won't die that doesn't mean I'm

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enjoying it describing oneself how are

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you and this is the one I was talking

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about

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foreign people

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when somebody says to you how are you

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please don't say okay

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in our brains

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especially if a male's talking to a

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female

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hey baby how you doing

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I'm okay

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what's wrong something's wrong

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something's wrong we don't take it as in

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it's good we're like something's wrong

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usually if I'm I can tell you right now

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if you come to me and you go how are you

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I'm okay I'm not okay I am not okay but

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I don't want to talk about it so please

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don't say that I will teach you other

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things to say but this is the one that

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gets if you see people look funny when

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you say when and I have a good friend

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she does this she'll go I'm okay with a

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big smile

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when I see her personally I get it but

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when I don't she'll text I'm okay and

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I'm like did I do something wrong is

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something wrong what's going on no I'm

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okay I'm like you don't get it that's

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not how we work you have to say I'm good

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I'm great and you want the truth we

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don't care if you're good or you're

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great just don't say okay

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okay

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and I did that on purpose for all those

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people that he said it ten times

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and when you're agreeing with someone

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you're like okay okay yeah okay you're

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agreeing you're letting the conversation

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continue so now that I've said why it's

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popular why don't we talk about why you

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should stop that's thing stop saying

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okay

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why should you stop saying okay number

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one it lacks strong commitment

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if you've ever asked somebody to do

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something with you like hey you want to

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go for dinner and they're like okay do

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you feel like they want to go oh you

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don't feel like they want to go so what

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you might want to say is use this

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instead for sure yeah for sure yes

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yes why don't you just say yes

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absolutely all right or this one why not

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it sounds brilliant why not yes it's

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because I'm so excited why not I can't

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think of anything better to do okay this

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is better than saying okay

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now it lacks emotion

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how is the meal it's okay

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it says black and white and no not black

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white it's gray it's okay like I told

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you it's like a gray day it's not really

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cold it's not wet there's not really

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much of a sun it's okay it's a day

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you're alive that's about it

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so we can turn around and say

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or I can say it's you relax motion if I

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want to talk about my day sorry I could

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say it's great fantastic it's

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interesting or brilliant and you go why

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would you write interesting well if you

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said how's your day and I go interesting

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now you're gonna whoa whoa what makes it

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interesting well I just got this great

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job offer or or this person over

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it draws conversation by point about not

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using okay is this when you dispense

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with the word or not use the word okay

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you open up more communication because

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your choice of words leads people to

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want to investigate and know more when

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you say okay it's like being something

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great there's nothing more to it no

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conversation it's the death of your

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conversation or language and you're here

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to learn how to speak more with others

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and communicate better this is what

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we're doing here so now you start seeing

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how these words and even a word like

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interesting can draw out more

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conversation

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cool especially if you say interesting

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they're going to go why is that person

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saying this now next it doesn't

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demonstrate you really want authentic

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permission

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if you say

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is it okay if I take your book

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it means I'm just asking you because

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I've been told I have to ask you

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but if I say hey are you sure it's okay

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if I take your book I'm saying are you

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sure I want to confirm with you another

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thing you can say is it all right if

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because it's right means correct right

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is it all right if I take off next

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Monday

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I'm asking I'm genuinely asking you for

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your permission I want authentic means

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real your real permission because I

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wanted to know it's okay with you I know

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I want it but I want to know you're okay

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with it saying okay again I want to know

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that you're happy with this as well

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I really care

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okay now here not giving authentic

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permission

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do you mind if I take your car

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okay

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do you really think I want to say it's

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like it's only like I'm being forced to

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do it but if I say to you yeah go ahead

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of course yeah no problem I'm totally

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into it I'm not just giving

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non-authentic permission I'm saying I'm

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really believing this I'm happy to do

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this with you for you and the last one I

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just told you is this one here

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it's when you can create unnecessary

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concern if I say how are you and you're

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like I'm okay

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I'm okay

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I'm gonna freak out I'm like dude what's

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wrong with you but if you say I'm great

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I'm good I'm well once again nobody

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cares

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we don't it's like when you say how are

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you you say it because it's a social

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convention that's what we do when we

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meet each other hey how are you I'm good

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me too I'm dying but I'm not going to

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tell you that because we're just

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crossing each other on the street right

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but when you say okay that might stop

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the person to go oh because that's not a

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usual response

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now I'm going to give you one little

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thing about this and I kind of lied when

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somebody says how are you if for

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instance if I was walking I fell on the

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ground like I'm okay I'm okay that's all

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right that's okay that's you're saying

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I'm not injured I'm not damaged in that

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case it's okay but if someone is saying

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how are you like today because I haven't

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seen you totally different so if it's

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just hey Tom how are you I'm good man

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don't say I'm okay

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but if Tom Falls you oh Tom Tom you okay

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yeah I'm okay you're so good

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fine note the difference because you'll

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say oh well that's it if you have an

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accident I'm okay it's fine perfectly

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fine and acceptable you probably

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wouldn't say I'm great I'm great that

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wouldn't make sense I'd be like he's

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he's hurt seriously Okay so

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I hope this lesson has given you an

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expansion in your vocabulary I know

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there's some repetition but it's not the

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repetition that's important it's your

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understanding of why we're saying it we

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want to give a stronger commitment to

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what we're saying we want to give more

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emotion we want to give a greater

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demonstration I'm giving permission or I

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really care when I'm asking for

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permission I really care how you feel

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and I don't want to create unnecessary

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concern or create a situation that

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didn't need to happen because of lack of

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communication cool so use these you'll

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get better communication but why don't

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we test that right away and I'm going to

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go back off this little click a trick

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shift yeah that's not the click I'll

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click we'll go to the board I'll teach

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you a couple other things you might want

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to know about the word okay and a quick

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quiz to make sure you understand how to

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use this and use it in your next

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conversation right away cool

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so

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you have no idea how much I want to say

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okay but I'm doing this lesson so so

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here's our quiz to start off with and

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then I'm going to move to your homework

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and extra information

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first Wing first one is if someone says

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to you how is your day how should you

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respond

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interesting or absolutely

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interesting remember what I said if you

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say interesting it says something

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happened that was not normal

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so the other person now wants to talk to

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you and we've created a conversation

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that they'll go oh what happened right

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and that's what you want more

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conversation how about number two do you

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want to see a movie later

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why not why not it's like well why not

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there's I can't think of anything better

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to do if you say I'm good you could say

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I'm good but don't

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because if I say hey you want to see a

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movie you're like I'm good it means no

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no not with you I'm good no thanks no

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thank you

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so I just taught you something that has

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nothing to do with okay if you want to

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be kind of mean and someone says so

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you wanna you wanna go out and be my my

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girlfriend I'm good thanks nah it means

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no so clearly you want to say why not to

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show enthusiasm this is the emotion part

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we're talking about next can I leave

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you're at work hey can I leave 20

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minutes early to get my child

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what's the appropriate response a good

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boss would say

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no problem or interesting

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a good boss is going to say no problem

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it's okay go ahead if they say

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interesting they're saying hmm 20

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minutes early

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interesting it's basically they don't

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believe you they maybe think you're

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lying so we don't want to say that we

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want to say no problem go ahead of

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course

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what about number four how is the

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weather today you know you're going

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outside or you're talking to your friend

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I want to go have a picnic how was the

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weather today

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go ahead or brilliant

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you probably noticed I didn't write that

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one down and you're like that's

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confusing I don't know but what do you

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think well go ahead is to get permission

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but you're not asking for permission so

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you're going to say brilliant well I

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saved that one because man anyone

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pulling up my pants here just so you

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know anyone from England goes it's

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brilliant it means excellent see I

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taught you another vocabulary word I put

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it in there when you weren't paying

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attention so if you say it's brilliant

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baby it's brilliant it means it's

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amazing how's the food it's brilliant

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and you're brilliant too because it also

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means very smart you're brilliant okay

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cool now the last one how are you please

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get this one right I just told you how

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it upsets many people who speak English

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get it right how are you

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is a great of or of course

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I know you said great because as I said

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you're brilliant yeah he said how are

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you I'm great I'm well I'm fine good

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thank you all right so now we've gone

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through our quiz and I know you got

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perfect on it I would like you to go

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over here where we're going to learn

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some other things about okay different

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ways to use it which give a different

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idea and a lot of this has to do with

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tone or repetition let's go to the board

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if someone says that is not okay

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that is not okay it's unacceptable it's

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not it's remember how I said okay means

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is when I say that's not okay it's not e

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it's no no that is unacceptable that is

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not okay to speak to a woman like that

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that is not okay to do this in your it's

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unacceptable 100 right so what you're

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like wow that went really quickly the

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wrong way yep if someone ever assists

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you that is not okay you have screwed up

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made a big big mistake next this one's

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interesting you have to watch for the

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tone that's why I put the red Tone If

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someone says this

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okay

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it means I'll do it but I don't want to

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you're driving your car the police comes

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and knocks over knocks in your window

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you roll it down

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you know uh you and mystery were driving

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very quickly you need to slow it down

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okay Officer okay I don't want to do it

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I'm going to because I don't want to go

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to jail okay

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or your friend goes you need to pick up

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the garbage you dropped okay

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I'm going to but I don't want to

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but you have to watch it because someone

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make that same okay slow okay but a

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sudden understanding if you say and then

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the sun sorry about the Sun the earth

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goes around the Sun I go okay oh I I

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didn't understand that but now I do okay

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sudden understanding tonality makes a

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difference okay

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okay yes no now you got it

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what about this one okay okay okay okay

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okay hurry up

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yo you got it yeah yeah okay okay okay

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okay yeah I got it I got it I got it I

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got it I got it I got it got it I got it

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sorry it means hurry up okay okay a

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quick okay okay

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now this is different this is a doubling

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of okay but if you're here okay it means

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got it so you go but it seems the same I

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go one means hurry up like okay okay

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okay okay okay yeah yeah hurry hurry

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hurry the other one like okay I got it I

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understand I'm saying it quickly so you

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will stop talking to me all right so now

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that we've got the little other little

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pieces of okay I always want to go down

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to something you can do to help yourself

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use these other things I've taught you

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and get greater understanding of this

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by homework first thing with homework is

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I want you to think where you could use

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this now when I mean I've given you the

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exact sentences but your next situation

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you're in you're like okay say I just

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said it okay so the next situation

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you're in and you want to someone's

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asking a question you're like I know I

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don't have to say okay for this can I

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say brilliant can I say great can I say

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sure go ahead what can I say I have

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practiced this because I've thought

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about it so now I can use it that's what

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I want from you

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knowledge is no good unless you

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understand it and you can use it and I

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know you'll be able to use this next you

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can use two examples that's why they

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wrote here and someone says can I call

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you later I want you and normally I

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would help you but I'm like no you're

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00:16:01.079 --> 00:16:03.120
big kids now you don't need to have

440
00:16:03.120 --> 00:16:05.399
someone Hold Your Hand anymore think of

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two ways you can say something if some

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if someone says can I call you later

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00:16:08.759 --> 00:16:11.220
what two things did I teach you out of

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00:16:11.220 --> 00:16:12.540
all of them I taught that you could say

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I could say this absolutely oops

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no more hints all right

447
00:16:17.820 --> 00:16:19.800
next one is if someone says how was your

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00:16:19.800 --> 00:16:21.300
day what two different ways you can

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00:16:21.300 --> 00:16:22.139
answer

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see you're not a robot you don't want to

451
00:16:24.180 --> 00:16:25.560
just have one answer and just can repeat

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00:16:25.560 --> 00:16:27.540
it if you notice for each thing I gave

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00:16:27.540 --> 00:16:29.459
you two or three different ways of

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addressing or saying something so

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practice them so that when you do this

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and think about where you can use it

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00:16:35.279 --> 00:16:37.320
you'll have two or three ways to use it

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00:16:37.320 --> 00:16:39.360
and now you're becoming like a native

459
00:16:39.360 --> 00:16:40.320
speaker

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00:16:40.320 --> 00:16:43.320
you're welcome anyway

461
00:16:43.320 --> 00:16:45.060
I want to give you my quote before I go

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this one's from John Lennon

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00:16:48.120 --> 00:16:51.000
John Lennon said everything will be all

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right and sorry everything will be okay

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00:16:52.860 --> 00:16:54.060
in the end

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if it's not okay it's not the end

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and I think this lesson is good

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and it's okay and this is the end of my

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00:17:01.320 --> 00:17:03.000
lesson but what I would like you to do

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00:17:03.000 --> 00:17:06.179
is subscribe there's a notification

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00:17:06.179 --> 00:17:08.220
button down at the bottom

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00:17:08.220 --> 00:17:10.500
hit it hit the Bell so you'll get all

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00:17:10.500 --> 00:17:12.419
the videos when they come out okay don't

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forget to hit like so you can see me

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00:17:14.100 --> 00:17:15.780
come back again in your inbox

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have a good one I'll see you later okay